Frequently Asked Questions

Do You Take Hair Supplements?

Nope. A lot of that stuff tends to be snake oil, and I think the only thing that really matters is eating a good, healthy diet and staying in as good shape as you can. "Magic pills" are about as effective for hair growth as they are in other areas of life, meaning not very. They are an attractive idea for people who want a quick fix and are desperate for longer locks, but I wouldn't put my trust in them. I have never once found real proof that any of them work beyond the hopeful anecdotes of people eager to grow out a mistaken hair cut. Your hair will grow roughly a half-inch per month, period -- unfortunately, what you need to do to grow it long is to simply handle it gently and carefully, sit tight, and let it grow. Patience is a real bear sometimes. :-)

How Long Did It Take For Your Hair To Grow?

This is actually not a simple question. When I was in high school in the 80s, I had a traditional poofy 80s wedge, and the stylist would use a buzz-clipper on the back of my neck, so it was pretty short. I decided I wanted to grow it long, and did the worst thing I could have in that situation: I listened to people who told me that if I wanted it long, I absolutely had to get it trimmed regularly. In retrospect, it was the stupidest thing I could have done -- who in their right mind thinks that cutting hair makes it anything but shorter? But people believe this, and I believed it. I was "trying to grow my hair," and I stalled out at shoulder length for about two years. When I complained to the stylist, I was sympathetically told, "Well, some women just can't!" It didn't start growing in earnest until I left to live on campus during my last two years at college -- and lived nowhere near that old salon. When I stopped cutting it, it got longer. Amazing, huh?

It was roughly waist-length about four or so years later. After reaching waist-length however, it stalled again. Ten years later, I realized why when I looked down and saw that my bathroom floor was dusted with little inch-long broken ends after I brushed it. My hair was still growing; it was just breaking off at roughly the same rate. The reason?

I wore it down every day, brushed it roughly, and washed it far too frequently. It was in tatters by the time each strand had been subjected to that for a few years. I made a pact with myself that I would wear it up every day for a year, just to see what happened. And again ... it began to grow. Then, I ditched the brush (well, I still have it face-up on the bathroom counter since my cat loves to rub herself on it) and began using a wide-tined comb.

And here I am at knee-length, some twenty-five years after making that decision when I was a teenager to try to grow my hair. You can see that it was punctuated by periods of growth and looooooooong periods of nothing. Had I known good handling and care, it would have taken far less time. You can also see why it took that long: it stalled for a few years while I was trimming it unnecessarily. Once that stopped, it grew again ... until stalling for over ten years because of damage and poor handling. Once I wore it up and replaced brush with comb, it began growing yet again and hasn't stopped thus far. I am starting to see some breakage at the ends though, so it might be time to try to leap the next hurdle in handling.

Infrequent trims are sometimes needed to remove damaged ends, but far more important is not to damage them in the first place. Trims every month are far too frequent to achieve anything, either way.

Do You Think You'll Ever Cut It?

Highly unlikely, unless I am forced to for health reasons (undergoing chemotherapy, as an example). I have however been considering taking off about the last six inches, as that is the last remains of the hair I had before I began taking good care of it, and hence it's a bit roadworn. I could probably stand to lose it. If I do decide to cut back up to classic length, I'll probably do so by visiting one of the few salons that specialize in very long hair, like the George Michael salon in Beverly Hills.

Why Did You Decide To Grow It So Long?

I just like it, and I've always liked very long hair. (These things might have had something to do with it, too.) It feels normal to me to have it this long, and I like the idea of having to do very, very little maintenance or fussing on my hair. A short cut takes far too much maintenance, and I can't even remember to visit the optometrist on anything approaching a reasonable schedule. On my head, even a crew cut would turn into a mullet in short order.

I also like seeing how long it will get just to satisfy my curiosity, and I like being able to pull every single hair back and out of my way, which can't be done at all with any shorter hair excepting a crew cut, which as I said above would rapidly turn into a mullet on me. What was originally an annoyance that I tolerated to see if it would grow (wearing it up constantly) has turned into one of the biggest advantages of very long hair: being able to tuck it away entirely, and in fun, creative ways. It's also a great excuse to buy hairsticks, clips, and slides, which are my permitted extravagance. They're a little pricey sometimes, but compared to other forms of hobby collecting (model trains, sound equipment, car gear, stuffed bears or whatever), they're reasonable enough.

And once it's all tucked away in a neat braid or bun, there's no reason not to let it get as long as it wants. Tailbone-length, classic-length, and knee-length are all one and the same once you spear it in place with a chopstick.

What's Your Hair Type?

In some ways, I'm not all that sure. It's probably, using Fia's typing system, a 3bCiii. (That means spiral curls about the size of a big magic marker, coarse individual hairs, and lots of them.) I used to think it was a 2c, but the older I get, the more I'm doubting that. Back in the day when I wore my hair down constantly, I also brushed it out all the time, so my hair never got the chance to form coherent curls. Now that it's longer, I never leave it down and keep it braided constantly from sopping wet to bone dry, meaning the curls still don't form naturally. (I chuckle when I hear people say that they bun or braid their hair for waves. I bun and braid my hair to straighten it out!)

I'm lukewarm toward the idea of letting the curls out completely for several reasons. First, I like having my hair up and out of my way completely, and letting my normal texture out to play would mean drying it loose and having significantly more volume to pin back and significantly less ability to do so firmly. Second, my hair has only gotten this long by my keeping it up constantly. At its current length, letting the curls out would translate to having a significant volume of hair all over the place at work, in the car, and at home.

As a result, there's not much chance of my hair ever getting to sit in its normal texture unless I use a three-day weekend as an excuse to see what happens when I try the BiracialHair.org technique. Even then, there's a chance that the years of wet-to-dry braiding have pressed the curl clean out of my longer hair (while the shorter new hairs I have are still spinning like tops).

It's all a bit complicated. So for the moment, it seems that I have to choose between length and curl, and I'm coming down on the length side. If I were ever to cut it shorter, I'd probably let the curl out to play more often, but at this point, it seems highly unlikely.

I am definitely aware of the fact that I know and see very few people with my hair texture, though. I once visited Wales as I like to do from time to time and while wandering around the maes at the Eisteddfod, it occurred to me that I had seen no one at all with hair like mine. I resolved to keep looking, and finally spotted two little biracial girls with a Middle Eastern father and a white mother who had hair that was the same texture as mine. Absolutely no one else did, though. Even here in southern California, I will see maybe one or two people a month, usually little biracial or Middle Eastern girls, with hair the same texture as mine.

Sometimes I feel like the little old man on the bridge in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. "African or European?" "Why, I don't kno--eeaarrrgh!"

What's Your Ethnicity?

100% southern Italian, which most often means thick and curly but can actually mean damned near anything. My mom had Cher hair -- straight, shiny, jet black, and took a curl very easily. My dad's was extremely wavy and kept short. Both of my brothers have extremely thick, curly hair; my oldest brother has 4a textured hair that doesn't get long so much as wide. And there's me, someplace in the middle. Somehow, we all ended up with far curlier hair than our parents. That's typical for people from our part of the world, though -- southern Italians are sort of half-and-half between Africa and Europe so while we tend to have darker skin and very curly hair, it's not always a given. My maternal grandmother and great aunt both had blue eyes.

Do You Use A Boar-Bristle Brush?

Nope. My hair is far too thick and coarse for a brush like that to do anything but ride over the top layer (and mat the rest). Also, when your hair is over four feet long, the major claim to fame of such brushes -- that they "distribute oils" -- is useless. No amount of brushing is going to "distribute oils" over a yard along the hair shaft, and the hard brushing required to do it will wear the cuticle away in record time. Remember, the secret to length is gentle handling, and brushing the living daylights out of your hair to wear at each and every hair strand individually isn't gentle.

As I state on the other pages on this site, I use a wide-tined comb to detangle, and coconut oil on the ends, which is chemically somewhat similar to sebum, the hair oils that the boar-bristle brushes supposedly distribute.

If You Wear It Up All The Time, Why Not Just Cut It?

Because then I couldn't wear it up at all. (Duh.)

How Come You're So Lucky?

While I may have a color or texture that you'd like to have (no guarantee of that, though), it's not luck that makes long hair. It's patience and the willingness to not fuss with it. Sometimes Mother Nature does make it thin or fine, and there's usually not a lot that can be done about that. But it's not like people are randomly attacked by roving gangs of scissors, either. If you keep saying you want long hair and keep impulsively getting the latest cute, new cut, then bad luck has nothing to do with your short hair. There's a strong possibility that you just don't want long hair. In that case, get that cute, new cut and enjoy your short styles.

Would You Be Interested In Letting Me Take Your Picture?

Nope.